Participant aspirations and collective boundaries

Dear participants, old and new friends,

Thank you for being part of the network, the movement – and this Gathering! 

The European Ecovillage Gathering is our biggest event and it is very dear to our hearts. Every year at the Gathering, we come together from all across Europe and we create a temporary community of 800+ people!

Although we are united by our interest in and dedication to the ecovillage movement, its vision, its values, and our commitment to regenerative, participatory, and community-based living, we each come with our own neurotype, background, culture, worldview, opinions and experiences, creating a rich and diverse tapestry of humans, who will interact a lot in various spaces during 6 days. 

It is very important to us to ensure that the European Ecovillage Gathering is a safer, respectful, inclusive, brave, transformative, caring, nourishing and inspiring space for all. 

To ensure the best conditions during this event we recognise that we are creating a temporary intentional community, where it is important to consciously create a common  culture and have shared agreements. 

This is why we have developed a set of aspirations and collective boundaries, outlined below. The aspirations are community agreements that invite us into a shared culture of respect and care, whilst the boundaries are clear non-negotiable rules that aim to ensure we all feel safe(r). 

We want to invite you on a collective learning journey. We are all learning how to be more self-aware, self-responsible, respectful, caring, mature and educated in our interactions, connections and relationships – in our communities and at our Gathering. The Gathering provides an opportunity to gain greater awareness of each other and ourselves and to learn and grow. 

These guidelines are tools to help us navigate our shared experience with care. Please take the time to read them before the Gathering begins, and let’s support one another in living them out—with kindness and patience for ourselves and each other.

Finally, we – GEN Europe – acknowledge that there will always be room for improvement, and we will continuously strive to improve them, with your feedback in the Gathering evaluation form.

PARTICIPANT ASPIRATIONS

As a participant to the European Ecovillage Gathering, I aspire to:

🧡 Be fully present.

🧡 Be honest, authentic, self-aware and self-responsible. 

🧡 Take responsibility for the nature of my experience.

🧡 Show up on time for sessions that I would like to participate in. I will respect the boundaries set by session hosts, such as signs on doors or maximum participant limits, and will not enter once the session has started or is marked as full.

🧡 Request support, guidance or help when I need or wish for it, using clear and direct requests.

🧡 Use tools, spaces & techniques available to me to regulate & process my emotions. I agree to make use of the Emotional Support Team if I need support.

🧡 Speak with people, not about them, and to use compassionate communication. If someone attempts to gossip to me about others, I agree to encourage them to speak directly to the person or to ask for facilitated support to carry the conversation with the person.

🧡 If a conflict arises that I am unable to resolve directly, I agree to seek mediation or facilitated support through the Emotional Support Team.

🧡 Ask people if they want my feedback before I give it to them, and at a time that is suitable for both of us.

🧡 Allow people to have their own experience and not intervene unless they ask for support – e.g. not giving touch/hugs or advice that has not been requested – especially in emotionally charged spaces such as sharing circles, healing practices, or ceremonial settings.

🧡 Stay aware of power dynamics, particularly when in positions of facilitation, leadership, or care; to engage with humility, transparency, and accountability; and I welcome feedback from others if I misuse my role or influence, understanding that accountability is a gift.

🧡 Be responsible and respectful with myself and in my interactions with others. I will use clear and direct verbal communication, ask for consent in all cases related to touch and intimacy, and practice consensual safer sex practices at the Gathering. (In some workshops or sessions there might be an invitation for touch. Giving and receiving touch is always optional.)

🧡 Honour my own energy and boundaries, practicing self-care and resting when needed so I can remain grounded and present throughout the Gathering.

🧡 If in a workshop I am not comfortable with something, I will make sure to express this clearly to the facilitators and/or my co-participants, and I will uphold my boundaries and participate only to the extent I choose to.

🧡 Treat all individuals with respect and dignity, regardless of any differences between us — including but not limited to gender identity, gender expression, sexual orientation, racialisation, ethnicity, nationality, culture, language, religion or belief system, socio-economic status, body size and appearance, physical or mental health, neurodiversity, disability, age, citizenship or migration status, family or relationship structure, political beliefs, education level, and personal opinions & experiences. I commit to cultivating awareness of moments when I may, consciously or unconsciously, act in a discriminatory way or uphold systems of oppression. When this happens, I will take responsibility for my actions and engage in learning, reflection, and growth. I commit to cultivating active allyship where possible. I affirm and respect each person’s right to self-identify and will honor the identities and pronouns my co-participants choose for themselves.

🧡 Practice “calling-in” with kindness — approaching mistakes or unconscious bias with compassion and invitation to learn, rather than shaming or blaming.

🧡 Engage respectfully with participants of all ages, with special attention to children and elders, recognising the importance of intergenerational care and understanding. Touching a child (e.g. their hair, giving them a hug, a little kiss) should only be done with their consent. 

🧡 Be mindful of language barriers and to support inclusive communication wherever possible, especially in multilingual or cross-cultural settings. This means, for instance, that if I am a native English speaker, I will pay attention to not speaking too fast and to using simple language rather than complicated words and idioms, or that if I meet people speaking my native language (other than English)  that I will check first if everyone in the group speaks that language before switching to it. 

🧡 Celebrate cultures in ways that are relational, not extractive; honouring stories, elders, and the ongoing struggles of marginalised peoples (including indigenous peoples); and asking myself the following questions:

  • Do my actions pay respect to the cultural tools I am borrowing from & do I humbly acknowledge the culture I’m borrowing from?
  • Do I know this culture well enough to not deliver false/distorted information about it?
  • Do I provide context for why this cultural tool is appropriate to use?
  • Is there a way I can communicate the same message using my own cultural practices?

🧡 Seek informed consent before taking photos or videos of other participants, and to be mindful of how content from the Gathering is shared, especially on social media. (Photos are not allowed in workshop spaces and sharing groups, except by GEN Europe’s media team and the workshop facilitator.)

🧡 Refrain from using illegal drugs or alcohol (outside the authorised bar where only light alcoholic beverages will be served) at the Gathering. I agree not to smoke on the community premises except for the designated smoking area.

🧡 Travel to and from the Gathering as sustainably as possible within my means ( = favouring walking, cycling, train, bus, ferry, car-sharing over flying and using a car for one person). If I must fly, I aspire to offsetting my emissions and reflecting on ways to reduce future impact.

🧡 Leave no trace at the host community after the end of the Gathering. This includes minimising “waste” and taking care of any material that I have brought to the site.

🧡 Keep noise in camping and community areas down after 22:00 and I agree not to enter areas marked as “private” and to use the main paths in the grounds to maintain the privacy of the host community members.

🧡 Recognise the potential for gathering such as this one to catalyse real-world change beyond these six days, carrying insights, actions and inspirations home.

COLLECTIVE BOUNDARIES

To help ensure that Gathering is a safer, inclusive, and enjoyable space for all, GEN Europe has put together a list of behaviors that are considered unacceptable. These collective boundaries are designed to support mutual respect and healthy interaction, so we can all relax, play, and connect freely. Let’s support one another in upholding them with care and accountability.

The following behaviors will not be tolerated at the Gathering:

❌ Physical violence, aggression, or abuse.

❌ Psychological violence or abuse, including insults, vilification, humiliation, manipulation, gaslighting, and stalking.

❌ Any form of discrimination or hostile attitude, in words or in deeds.

❌ Sexual harassment, including unwanted or non-consensual physical contact, verbal sexual advances, or intimidation.

❌ Child abuse, exploitation, and neglect.

❌ Possession or use of weapons or harmful chemicals.

❌ Taking photos, videos, or audio recordings of participants (of any age) without their clear consent. 

❌ Sharing, displaying, or circulating discriminatory, humiliating, or sexually explicit material.

❌ Coercion, manipulation, or social pressure to adopt specific belief systems, engage in rituals (high-pressure invitations into spiritual, sexual, or community practices that are not clearly explained or consensual), or participate in unwanted activities.

❌ Behaviour that creates a hostile, intimidating, or offensive environment for others.

❌ Persistent disruptive actions or deliberate attempts to disturb sessions, activities, or group harmony, that disregard group agreements or facilitator requests, while recognising that constructive dissent and questioning are part of healthy community life.

❌ Use of illegal drugs (which drugs are illegal may vary from country to country so the legislation in the host country will apply), even if these substances may be normalised or tolerated in other contexts.

Please be aware that violating these boundaries may result in being asked to leave the Gathering. GEN Europe reserves the right to deny entry or re-entry if the safety or wellbeing of participants is deemed to be at risk. Where possible, we aim to address harm through restorative or transformative approaches before resorting to exclusion, though safety remains our priority.

There will be a safety team, an emotional support team and a medical care team onsite available for support and to enforce these boundaries and to take measures if needed. Information on how to seek support and report incidents will be clearly displayed in various locations (such as next to programme boards, workshops spaces, toilets, etc.)

CONSENT

Consent is clear, affirmative, and essential. It is never a grey area. At the same time, we recognise that many of us are on an ongoing journey of learning how to practice and embody consent more consciously and respectfully in all areas of life. We have collected some resources to support deepening our awareness of what consent is, how it is communicated, and what it can look and feel like in different contexts.

🩷 1. WHAT IS CONSENT?

Consent is an ongoing, mutual agreement between people to engage in a specific interaction. It must be given freely, clearly, and enthusiastically — without pressure, manipulation, or impairment — and can be withdrawn at any time.

It’s everyone’s responsibility to uphold a consent culture for safer communities. 

Consent is not just about sex.
It applies to:

  • Physical contact (hugs, touch, dancing)
  • Gifts and substances (especially if mind-altering)
  • Photography and video
  • Entering personal spaces (tents, domes, cuddle puddles)
  • Emotional labor (venting, asking for help)
  • Objects (taking people’s stuff

🍟 2. THE FRIES MODEL OF CONSENT

F.R.I.E.S. is a widely used model that helps clarify what true consent looks like. It stands for:

  • Freely Given – No pressure, guilt-tripping, coercion, or intoxication.
  • Reversible – Consent can be withdrawn at any time, even if things have already started.
  • Informed – Both people understand what they’re consenting to. No deception or withheld information.
  • Enthusiastic – A real yes! — not a “fine, whatever” or a silent shrug.
  • Specific – Saying yes to one thing doesn’t mean yes to everything. Consent is not a blanket agreement.

Example:
Saying “yes” to a cuddle doesn’t mean you’ve said yes to making out or being touched elsewhere. Consent is moment-by-moment.

This model is helpful for reminding people that consent is about communication, not just checking a box.

🌀 3. THE WHEEL OF CONSENT

Created by Dr. Betty Martin, the Wheel of Consent is a powerful framework for understanding who is doing, who it’s for, and how power is exchanged.

The Four Quadrants:

  • Giving – You do something for someone else’s benefit. (e.g., giving a massage they want)
  • Receiving – You allow someone to do something for your benefit. (e.g., receiving a massage)
  • Taking – You do something for your benefit, with the other person’s permission. (e.g., touching someone’s hair because you want to, and they consent)
  • Allowing – You allow someone to do something for their benefit. (e.g., letting someone hug you because they need comfort)

Key insight:
We often confuse or collapse these roles — the wheel helps bring clarity.

Why it matters in consent culture:

  • Helps uncover hidden assumptions (“I thought I was doing this for you, but it was actually for me.”)
  • Encourages honest requests, clearer boundaries, and mutual awareness
  • Helps identify manipulation or pressure disguised as generosity

🗣 4. CONSENT LANGUAGE: ASKING, SAYING NO, RECEIVING NO

✅ Asking for Consent – Examples

  • “Can I hug you?”
  • “Would you like a shoulder massage?”
  • “Would you be open to cuddling right now?”
  • “Is it okay if I take your photo?”
  • “Would you be interested in kissing or connecting more intimately?”

❌ Saying No – Examples

  • “No, thank you.”
  • “Not right now.”
  • “I’d prefer not to.”
  • “I’m not feeling that, but thanks for asking.”
  • “That’s a no for me.”

It’s important to normalize direct and kind refusals. “No” is a full sentence — and it’s not personal.

🙏 Receiving a No Gracefully

  • “Thank you for being clear.”
  • “Thanks for taking care of yourself.”
  • “I appreciate you being honest.”
  • Don’t guilt-trip, argue, or try to negotiate the no.
  • Be aware of body language and tone — show that you genuinely respect their answer.

Modeling gracious responses to ‘no’ is how we create safer community. It’s a culture of mutual care, not personal rejection.

⚠️ 5. CHALLENGES FOR CONSENT

🍷 1. Intoxication

Consent and intoxication is one of the most complex realities in festival spaces.

How to navigate this responsibly:

  • Avoid initiating new sexual connections when someone is noticeably altered.
  • If both people are high and have a prior foundation of trust and communication, extra care, explicit verbal check-ins, and post-play debriefs become crucial.
  • Use slow pacing, clear verbal language, and simple yes/no questions.
  • Recheck consent multiple times: “Do you still want this?”
  • If you’re unsure whether someone can give meaningful consent: pause or stop.

Important distinction:
Being “friendly,” “flirty,” or “physically open” under the influence ≠ consent. Intoxication often lowers inhibition but doesn’t remove the need for clear, mutual agreement.

Best practices:

  • Consider a no-new-intimacy-while-altered personal or camp guideline.
  • Normalize a “wait until we’re sober” culture — it often leads to deeper, more trusting connections later.
  • Practice post-consent conversations the next day: “How was that for you?” to repair or affirm what happened.

🌍 2. Cultural Differences

  • Cultural and personal backgrounds can affect how people express boundaries. In some cultures, direct “no” is discouraged or considered rude.
  • Body language, indirect language, or avoidance can signal discomfort — it’s important to ask, not assume.
  • Encourage explicit verbal check-ins, even if it feels awkward or redundant.
  • Normalize saying no and hearing no as acts of mutual respect, not rejection or confrontation.

🧠 3. Neurodiversity

We all have different neurotypes — some of us have autism, ADHD, or experience sensory processing differences.

These neurotypes may experience or express consent differently:

  • Some may have difficulty reading body language, tone, or implied social cues
  • Others may experience touch, sound, or interaction as overwhelming or unpredictable
  • Some might use very direct language that can seem blunt or out of sync
  • Others may mask discomfort to maintain social connection, making it hard to detect a non-consensual yes

What helps:

  • Clear, verbal, and literal communication: “Would you like a hug?” > “Come here!”
  • Asking permission before initiating any kind of touch or closeness
  • Offering space for a pause or timeout — overstimulation is real
  • Accepting “no” or hesitation without needing explanation
  • Creating zones or cues for sensory-safe interaction (e.g. coloured bandanas, hand signs, quiet zones)

⚖️ 4. Power Imbalances

  • Social capital, leadership roles, popularity, age, or experience can all create dynamics where someone may feel pressured to say yes.
  • Check yourself: Would they still say yes if I weren’t in this position?
  • Make space for someone to express boundaries without consequence — e.g. “It’s totally okay if you’re not feeling it.”

👯 5. Assumptions Based on Clothing or Vibe

  • Flirtation, nudity, openness, or sensual behavior does not equal consent.
  • Don’t assume “yes energy” applies to everything — always ask:
    “Is this okay?” “Would you like this?” “Are you into that?”

📖 6. FURTHER RESOURCES

Videos:

Instagram: 

Articles: 

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this long but essential document! Together we care for one another, together we learn, together we create community!